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WAIT AND SEE 



A COMEDY-DRAMA IN THREE ACTS 



BY 

HELEN C. CLIPFOED 

Author of "Alice's Blighted Profession," 
"Whose Widow," etc., etc. 



Copyright, 1919, by 
Fitzgerald Publishing Corporation 



FITZGERALD PUBLISHING CORPORATION 

Successor to 

DICK & FITZGERALD 

18 Vesey Street w York 



4 Wait and See 

Mr. Harrison. A nervous man about fifty. He is very 
much interested in bugs; always carries a bottle 
with a bug in it ; wears goggles. 

Mrs. Langster. A stunning, middle-aged society woman. 

Mr, Langster. A successful business man. 

Josephine. A beautiful young lady, rather haughty. 

Mae. A sweet and pretty young girl. 

Matilda. A typical old maid trying to look young and 
chic, wears curls and dresses in bright colors. Also 
wears a necklace. 

Dick. A young, rising lawyer; very determined look- 
ing, and very much in love with Josephine. 

Fred. A young lad of about twenty-one. 

Agnes. A timid young girl of eighteen. 

Robert. A rather good-looking but shy j^oung man. 

James. A typical English butler. 

All Characters Wear Appropriate Summer Clothes. 



INCIDENTAL PROPERTIES. 

Small bottle containing bug, wallet containing bills, 
goggles for Mr. Harrison. Watch for Mr. Langster. 
Loose flowers to be placed in vases for Mrs. Langster. 
Book for Catherine. Documents, papers and books for 
Dick. Pistol and a document similar to Dick's for 
James. Engagement ring for Josephine. Stick-pin and 
small ball of paper for Fred. Knitting for Matilda. 
Bunch of flowers for Robert Jones. Package of letters, 
etc., in safe. 



STAGE DIRECTIONS 

As seen by a performer on the stage facing the audi- 
ence, r. means right hand; l., left hand; c, center; d.r., 
door at right ; d.l., door at left. Up means toward back 
of stagey down, toward footlights. 



WAIT AND SEE 

ACT I 

SCENE: — Up-to-date library in Mr. Langster's home, 
where the guests are spending a iveek-end. The 
room must convey the impression of the principal 
lounging and living room in a wealthy man's spa- 
cious home. The furnishings and furniture must 
tend to the same end. Rugs on floor. Curtains on 
wall — these must be so arranged that some of the 
characters can hide behind them. Table down c. 
with armchairs r. and l. Doors at r. and l., another 
EXIT at c. through large windows leading onto the 
veranda or to the lawn. There is a safe r., a couch 
l., bookcase near couch. On the table and bookcase 
are books and vases for flowers. DISCOVERED 
Tom in earnest conversation with Diana at table. 



Tom. I think I have made everything perfectly clear, 
have I not? 

Diana (sighs). Yes, I suppose so. 

Tom. And remember this, that if you do not go 
through with your part — well — I know of that little 
stunt pulled off at Bets ' the other night. 

Diana (gasps). Oh, please 

Tom. Well, if you do as I want you to, don't worry, 
I won't squeal. Go as far as you like here, but there is 
one thing that I insist upon, and that is that you secure 
that deal from Dick Langster. 

Diana. And if I do not ? 

Tom (carelessly). Well, I'll simply spill the beans. 

Diana (sneers). But remember, you introduced us 
here. We are posing as your friends. 

Tom. Don't worry, I can easily admit that I was 
duped. 

Diana. By the way, why are you so anxious to obtain 
that scrap of paper 1 

Tom (much excited). Scrap of paper nothing) Why, 

5 



6 Wait and See 

woman, the getting of that document may mean a for- 
tune for me, the losing of it — failure. 

Diana. Well — I'll do my best. 

Tom. You bet your life you will do your best and 
that mighty quick, too. 

Diana. If I am successful in getting it, you promise 
to let me alone and forget about the Bets' robbery? 

Tom. Yes, and 

ENTER Catherine d.r., carrying book. 

Catherine. Say, Liz 

Tom. Please remember her name is Diana for the 
present and yours Catherine. 

Catherine. Ah, gee, you needn't get so sore about 
it. What 's in a name, anyhow ? As I was saying, Li — 
(to Tom) Beg your pardon, I mean Di-an-a, there is 
going to be one great haul here. 

Diana. Please be careful, don't get caught. 

Catherine. Caught! Ah, quit your kiddin'. Say, 
kid, when did you ever see me get caught ? 

Diana. Yes, you have been pretty fortunate — but 
watch your step. 

Catherine. I git you. But say, there is the finest 
collection of swells here I ever saw, and it won't be 
Sally Duram to let them go unpicked. (Walks up and- 
down stage, well satisfied witJt self) 
ENTER Servant d.l. Catherine drops in chair, busy 

reading. 

Servant. Pardon me, did you ring ? 

Diana. No. [EXIT Servant d.l. 

Catherine. Gee, that was a narrow escape. He al- 
most heard me. 

Diana. Do you know, that man 's face is sort of familiar. 

Tom. Nonsense. It is purely imaginative. 

Diana. Well — maybe — but still — I can't help think- 
ing it. 

Tom. Come on out, the folks will be looking for us. 
(Catherine curls herself on couch, reads) 

[EXIT Diana and Tom c. 
ENTER Mr. Harrison d.r., carrying a bottle containing 

a bug. He walks over to table, interested in bottle. 

Catherine (from couch). Good-evening, Mr. Harri- 



Wait and See 7 

son. (Mr. Harrison jumps) Oh, oh, what a pretty 
fish! (Goes over to table, looks at bottle) 

Mr. Harrison. Why — eh — eh — that isn't a fish, that's 
a miseoraplit, the only bug of its kind in existence. 

Catherine (wide-eyed). Really! And can it walk 
like other bugs? 

Mr. Harrison. Walk? I presume you mean crawl. 

Catherine (giggles). Oh, how funny you are, Mr. 
Harrison How stupid of me. 

Mr. Harrison. Now yesterday I found a frelopotikic, 
a species not in existence for the last forty years. 

Catherine. How interesting. Yes, we had one for 
breakfast this morning. 

Mr. Harrison. For breakfast this morning? I don't 
understand. 

Catherine (confused). I mean I had lobsters last 
night. 

Mr. Harrison (looks at Catherine rather puzzled). 
Now this (Meaning bug) little intelligent fellow's 
( Catherine takes Harrison's wallet from Jiis hip pocket, 
empties it, replaces it, all unnoticed by Harrison J lount- 

rellis and salimbries are constructed in such a 

ENTER Servant d.l. 

Servant. Did you ring, sir? 

Harrison. What did you say ? 

Catherine. He wants to know if you gave me the 
ring yet. (To Servant,) You may go, James. 

[EXIT Servant d.l., after furious look at 
Catherine. 

Harrison. Why, eh — eh, what did the fellow mean? 

Catherine. I suppose he was talking of a coffee ring 
or something to eat. (Goes to window) Oh, oh, look! 
I see a heminglobtic in the garden. 

Harrison. A what? 

Catherine. Do you mean to say you have never 
heard of that bug? Why, my grandfather said it was 
the most valuable of all bugs. 

Harrison. Really, I must have one, then, for my col- 
lection. Has it got a homidopic and a sardiorup.l 

Catherine. Yes, and a shimickorv and a twostepic 
foxtrotlitic. 



8 Wait and See 

Harrison (excited, clapping hands). Oh, goody, 
goody! I must have one. How interesting! Where in 
the garden did you see it? 

Catherine. About two feet away from the north end 
of the grass plot. 

Harrison. I shall find it. [EXIT d.r., running. 

Catherine (laughs). I hope he finds his brains in the 
hunt also. Now let me see (Takes money from pocket) 
Ten, twenty, thirty, forty. Well — not so bad. The poor 
boob will think he lost this crawling after that cute little 
hemingway. [EXIT c, siiiging. 

ENTER Mr. and Mrs. Langster, d.l., talking, Mrs. 
Langster carrying flowers. 

Mrs. Langster. I suppose as long as they were intro- 
duced by Tom, they must be above-board. 

Mr. Langster. Why, of course. I should think that 
just being Tom's friends ought to be sufficient. 

Mrs. Langster (seats self). Well, I suppose so. 
Nevertheless, I don't like the way Diana is monopolizing 
Uick — Josephine k sure to resent it. 

Mr. Langster, A lot of nonsense. Why, Diana is 
simply interested in Dick's work 

Mrs. Langcter. It appears to me she is a little too 
interested. 

Mr. Langster (looks at watch). I'll just barely make 
that train. By the way, dear, I would not worry too 
much over these things. They will quickly adjust them- 
selves. Good-bye. [EXIT d.r. 

Mrs. Langster (arranging flowers). I suppose John 
is right. But I can't help seeing how dear Josephine is 
worrying. 

ENTER Josephine r. 

Josephine (from door). Oh, pardon me, Mrs. Lang- 
ster, I had no idea any one was here. I just wanted a 
book. 

Mrs. Langster. Come right in, dear, I want to talk 
to you. (Both sii on couch) Josephine, dear, you are 
not happy. 

Josephine. Why— eh— what makes you think that? 

Mrs. Langster. Now, dear, don't pretend you do not 
understand me. I can see what is going on/ 



Wait and See g 

Josephine (sobs). Well — I — am — not hap-py. Dick 
seems to find more time to spend with Diana than he 
can with me. (Cries) 

Mrs. Langster. There, there, child. 

Josephine. I don't care, I am disgusted with the 
whole business and I am half inclined to break our en- 
gagement. 

Mrs. Langster. Now, dear, don't do anything rash. 

Josephine. Don't worry, Mrs. Langster, it won't be 
rash on my part. (Rises) I am simply sick of it all. 

Mrs. Langster. But, have you grounds for your sus- 
picions ? 

Josephine. Grounds ? Ye gods, I should say I have. 

I have come upon them several times 

ENTER Catherine a, reading from book. 

Catherine (reading dramatically). And the knight, 
with arms outstretched, cried, "I will save you, Rosa- 
lind! I come — I come — I (Trips over rug and falls) 
came." (Mrs. Langster and Josephine both laugh) 

Mrs. Langster. My dear child, you will hurt your- 
self some day, you are forever tripping. 

Catherine. Yes, I must admit that my equilibrium 
at times does become a little unbalanced. 

Mrs. Langster. Come along, Josephine, we will finish 
our talk outside. 

[EXIT Mrs. Langster and Josephine at c, talking. 

Catherine (rubbing foot). I almost broke my neck. 
ENTER Servant d.l. 

Servant. Ahem, pardon me, miss, the ladies in the 
next room are complaining of a draught. A window 
must be open here. 

Catherine. Oh, my, no, there is no window open 

here ; by the way, perhaps your mouth was open. (EXIT 

Servant d.l., head in air) I sure am getting that guy's 

goat. [EXIT d.r., singing. 

ENTER Mae d.l. 

Mae (drops in chair). What a blessing to find a room 
empty. At last I can think. Now let mo see — Rob wants 
me to go out to California when we are married. But — 
oh, dear — how can I leave all that is most dear and 
sacred to me? 



io Wait and See 

ENTER Matilda d.l. 

Matilda (holding head, drops on couch). Oh, dear, 
oh, dear, my head is just splitting. 

Mae. Dear aunt, did you not have a restful night? 

Matilda. Last night I was in agony from 12 to 2 — in 
agony. I do not know what I would do without my 
pills. I took one at 2 and the pain vanished immedi- 
ately. 

Mae. Why didn't you take it at once? 

Matilda. Mae, you have not the slightest compre- 
hension of medicines. Fortunate child, it is your lack 
of experience. Medicines never act if taken at once. 

Mae. Is that so? 

Matilda. Mae, no wonder my health has suffered. 
Something great has happened. 

Mae. Really ! 

Matilda. Robert Jones comes here every evening. 
Now I ask what can that mean? 

Mae (archly). I am — sure — eh — I don't know. 

Matilda. I ask what does it mean? He sits and 
talks and talks.. Nominally to you. I have watched 
him; he never speaks to me. (Counts on fingers) He 
never looks at me — one. He never speaks to me — two. 
But he brings me flowers — three. He said they were 
from his sister — four. Now, my child — why does he 
bring me flowers and say they are from his sister? 

Mae (surprised). Because they are. 

Matilda (shakes head). Dear girl, you are too young; 
I should have considered that. But there is a time in 
a woman's existence (Far-away look) when she craves 
the sympathy of her sex. Go, child, go ; at some distant 
day your own turn will come, and then you will under- 
stand. 

Mae (moves toward door). Yes, aunt. 

Matilda. Stay one instant. He is good-looking. His 
face is careworn: he is no mere boy, but a man of ex- 
perience. Mae, T would not marry a boy. 

Mae (coming back to room). Aunt, do you mean to 
say you want to marry Bob? 

Matilda. Silly child, does a woman say such things? 



Wait and See n 

Of course I know he is much older than I. That is a 
matter I am seriously considering. 

Mae (excited). Do you mean to say he has actually 
asked you? 

Matilda. Not directly. But I have my reasons to 
believe he will do so tonight. And I want you to help. 

Mae. What can I do ? 

Matilda. You can leave us alone for a time. Poor 
boy, he hardly ever has an opportunity to be alone 
with me and he has hinted as much. 

ENTER Servant d.r. 

Servant. Robert Jones is in the drawing-room and 
wishes to see Miss Matilda. [EXIT d.l. 

Matilda. There, child, I knew it. Go down, dear, 
and amuse him while I complete my toilet. 

[EXIT Mae d.r., Matilda d.l. 
ENTER Dick d.l., carrying a number of books and 
papers under arm,. Goes to table, hunts through 
books, papers, etc., busy reading. 

Dick (takes paper from inside pocket). Now, let me 

see, it says here 

ENTER Diana c, stands at door an instant, watches 
Dick with narrowing eyes. 

Diana. Ah, ah, so there you are, Dickie dear. ( Goes 
over and sits on arm of his chair, plays with his hair) 
Poring over these stupid papers as usual. 

Dick. I have here a very important document which 
must be settled instantly. (Holds up paper) 

Diana. Really? And what is it all about? 

Dick. Well, there is a certain firm in this city that 
would give thousands to secure this paper. 

Diana (tries to appear disinterested). How interest- 
ing and 

ENTER Josephine a, stands at door, watches Dick and 
Diana, face a study. 

Josephine (cuttingly). Pardon me, I had no idea 
there was anyone in here. I won't intrude. 

Dick (jumps up — almost upsets Diana). But Jose- 
phine [EXIT Josephine d.k., head in air. 

Diana. And this little 

Dick. Yes, yes. (Places paper in book, absent-mind- 



ia Wait and See 

edly) I wish Josephine would be sensible. 

[Quick EXIT d.r. 

Diana (excited). At last I've got it and oh (Takes 
paper from, book — liides it behind bookcase) at last I 
shall be free. 

ENTER Servant d.l., watches Diana with narrowing 

eyes. 

Servant. Did you ring, miss? 

Diana (startled). No — o — ah — I mean yes. Please 
see — tell Oh, I don't want you. 

Servant. Yes, mam. [EXIT d.l. 

Diana. That servant will make a total wreck of me 
vet. I must find Tom and deliver the prize to him, and 
then (Flings arms wide) FREEDOM. [EXIT c. 

ENTER Servant — takes paper from behind bookcase — 
puts it back in book — places another paper much 
like the first behind bookcase — quick EXIT d.l. 
ENTER Dick d.r. He rushes in, very much excited. 

Dick. Ye gods, where did I leave that document? 
(Searches through papers on table, opens book, finds 
'paper) Thank God, it is safe ! 

ENTER Josephine d.r. 

Josephine. Dick, I have something very important to 
say to you, that is, if you can spare the time. 

Dick. Good gracious, Josephine, what is the matter 
with you? You act like a perfect child. 

Josephine. I will admit I do not act like Diana, 
still 

Dick. Listen, Josephine, can't you see what a fool 
you are making of yourself? 

Josephine. Yes, I suppose I do appear a fool in 
your eyes. Nevertheless, there are others who consider 
me otherwise. 

Dick. Ye gods, let's talk sense. What under the 
sun are you driving at ? 

Josephine (with spirit,). It is simply this, since you 
prefer Diana f s company to mine, I will release you and 
step aside for her. 

Dick. Come, come, Josephine, don't talk foolishly. 

Josephine. . No, I am not talking foolishly. I have 
gone over this matter too thoroughly for that. Can you 






Wait and See 13 

give me any explanation for your curious behavior? 

Dick. Now, Josephine, do be sensible, you only im- 
agine all this. 

Josephine. Oh, no; my imagination is not quite as 
vivid as all that. 

Dick. Josephine, if you will only wait. I cannot 
explain now. I am sorry that you look at it in that 
light. 

Josephine (haughtily). Then that means that we 
break our engagement. Here (Takes off ring) give this 
to Diana. I hope she will be happier than I. 

Dick. Oh, Josephine, please, please. Can't you see 
how you are torturing me. 

Josephine. I crave your pardon, but here (Meaning 
ring) take this, it means nothing to me now. 

Dick (pleads). Josephine, dear, won't you wait and 
see. 

("Josephine holds ring out— £)ick pleading) 

CURTAIN 



ACT II 

SCENE: — The same as Act I. Evening of the same 
day. DISCOVERED Diana sitting r., Tom stand- 
ing near bookcase. 

Diana. Now before I deliver the paper up to you, I 
want your promise to let me go and never, never trouble 
me again. 

Tom. Don't worry, I won't trouble you again. So 
long as I get what I want I should worry about you. 

Diana. Exactly. You are too selfish to think of any- 
one else. 

Tom (shrugs shoidders). Just as you say, my fair 
damsel. (Bows mockingly) But enough of this, give 1110 
the document. 

Diana. If your lordship will condescend to bend his 
honorable knees he will find the prize behind that book- 
case. 



14 Wait and See 

Tom (bends down, eagerly opens paper, face a study). 
My God, woman, this is no time for jesting! Where is 
that paper? 

Diana. Why, in your hands, of course. 

Tom. Ha, ha, ha ! There, I laughed at your little 
joke. Now be done with this childish play and tell me 
where you hid it. 

Diana (confused). I — I — don't understand. 

Tom. Very prettily said, my beauty. Perhaps you 
think you can put me off this way. But I tell you that 
if you do not get that paper for me as you promised, I 
will turn you over to the authorities. 

Diana. But I swear I did not commit that robbery 
at the Bets and I will convince the judge of my inno- 
cence. So hand me over (Siglis) I am sick of all this. 

Tom. Convince the judge, is it? (Sneers) Five 
years ago did you convince the judge of your innocence? 

Diana (hands over face). Oh, please (Sobs) please 
have pity. 

Tom. Then you had a rich father to back you, but 
now, tell me what judge would believe you, what 

Diana (jumps up). Stop ! For God's sake stop! All 
right, I will do as you say. Believe me or not, I cer- 
tainly hid that document behind that bookcase. 

Tom. Perhaps you did, but this is what I found. 
(Hands paper to Diana) 

Diana (reads). "Perseverance is a great thing, ap- 
plying it to something worth while, you will succeed, 
but, on the other hand, using it on something unworthy 
it will mean rain." (To Tom J I don't quite get the 
meaning. But what has happened to that document ? I 
could swear that I placed it there. (Points to bookcase) 

Tom. Maybe you did and maybe you didn't. Never- 
the less, I want it, and mighty quick at that. [EXIT d.r. 
Diana (walks vp and down stage, very dramatic, very 
nervous). This house is uncanny. (Throws arms in 
air) Oh, why, oh, why am I not strong enough to break 
the chains that fasten me here? 

ENTER Catherine d.r., stares at Diana in amazement. 
Catherine. Gee, Liz, that was great, but why the 
drama ? 



Wait and See 15 

Diana (arms around Catherine,). Oh, Catherine, I 
am simply sick of it all. I hate feeling that I am an 
impostor here. (Sobs) 

Catherine (tenderly). There, there, Diana. Every 
cloud has a silver lining, so I advise you to turn your 
cloud inside out and show the lining. Oh, and by the 
way, look what I have. (Takes money, rings, etc., from 
pocket) 

Diana (gasps). Catherine, where did you get them? 

Catherine. Oh, just a few tokens of affection from 
some of my many admirers. 

Diana. Catherine, didn't you promise me that you 
would never, never take another thing that did not be- 
long to you 1 

Catherine. Yes. 

Diana. Oh, then, I am so disappointed. 

Catherine. But Diana, I only did it for the fun of 
the thing. When I gave you that promise I meant it. 

Diana. Oh, my, yes, it certainly looks as though you 
did. (Waves hand towards articles) 

Catherine. I must admit it does look a little suspi- 
cious; nevertheless, everything will be 0. K. 

ENTER Servant d.l., Catherine hurriedly throws 
spoils into pocket. 

Servant and Catherine (together). Did you ring? 

Catherine (uppish air). James, I am expecting 
Count Discount from Countless County of the country 
of No- Account. When he calls do not count me among 
the absent. That is all, James. 

[EXIT Servant d.l., furious look. 

Diana (laughs). Catherine, how do you do it? 

Catherine. Oh, I just like to tease him. (Arms 
around Diana ) Come, Diana, chase Mr. Glum away. 
The folks will miss us. Let us get a breath of air. 

[EXIT Diana and Catherine C, talking and laughing. 

ENTER Fred d.l., and r'ajht behind him on tiptoe 
AGNES. Both look around room from u 

Fred. Hush, T think the road is clear. (Both search 
room, look under chairs, couch, behind bookcase, out- 
doors) 



i6 Wait and See 

Agnes (drops in chair rJ. Whew! of all the pests, 
Catherine is the limit. 

Fred (sits on couch). I thoroughly agree with you. 
She is forever butting into our affairs. 

Agnes. Wherever she gets the nerve from, I would 
like to know. 

Fred. Look, Agnes, there is room here for two. 

Agnes (bashful). Oh, I don't want to. 

Fred. Ah, come on. 

Agnes. Ah, no. 

Fred. Well, then, I will use force and carry you 
over. 

Agnes. Oh, no, you won't. 

Fred. Yes, I will. 

Agnes. No, you won't. 

Fred. Why not? 

Agnes (walking over to couch). See, because I come 
myself. (Sits on end of couch) 

Fred. Come a little closer, I won't hurt you. 

Agnes. Ah, no. 

ENTER Catherine a, reading from book. 

Agnes and Fred (looking at one another). Oh! 

Catherine (reading from book). "With a mighty 
sweep of his iron strong arms the brave knight snatched 

his lady-love from the — jaws of " (Sees Agnes and 

Fred ) Ah, ah, so there you are, my Romeo, my hero. 
(Sits down between them) Long have I longed for this 
day. (Agnes and Fred exchange looks, Catherine toys 
with Fred's tie, takes stick-pin unnoticed by Fred or 
Agnes, hides pin in her pocket) You are so brave, so 
handsome, how fortunate I am to have met you. 

Fred. Eh, eh, I beg your pardon. (Rises froyn couch, 
Catherine pulls him down) 

Catherine. Don't leave me like that. 
Fred. You will excuse me for a minute. I'll be 
right back. 

Catherine. Very well. 

[EXIT Fred c, gives Agnes a knowing look, Agnes 

rolls eyes. 

Catherine. Isn't he grand, and he is so much in 

love with me. Oh, happy day, happy day, happy 



Wait and See 17 

(Small ball of paper comes in through window, picks it 
up, reads it) By the way, Agnes, I forgot to tell you 
Mrs. Langster wants to see you. 

Agnes. Wants to see me? 

Catherine. Yes, and I think it very important. 

Agnes. Oh, dear, I must hurry. [EXIT d.l. 

Catherine. I hope Mrs. Langster does want her. 
Now let me see — (Reads) "Darling. When you get 
rid of that pest give a low whistle and I will fly to you. 
Your own true love/' Gee, this will be rich. (Gives a 
loiv whistle, hides behind couch) 

ENTER Fred q., running in. 

Fred. Dear, I have come. Where are you? 

Catherine (creeping up from behind couch, places 
hands over his eyes). Here I are. 

Fred. Oh, you cute little thing. (Turns around) 
You! 

Catherine (arm around his neck). My Romeo, I 
knew you would be surprised. 

Fred. Surprised? Ah, no, disappointed. 
ENTER Agnes d.l. 

Agnes. Why, Catherine, Mrs. Langster didn't want 
me. 

Catherine. Really? How stupid of me. ("Fred goes 
to take Agnes' hand, Catherine takes his, all run out 
of room a, much confusion) 

ENTER Matilda d.l., carrying knitting bag, crosses to 
r., sits on chair. 

Matilda (knits). Yesterday, dear Robert eld not get 
a chance to propose. But today he will and must. 
ENTER Servant d.r. 

Servant. Robert Jones to see Miss Matilda. 

Matilda. Show him up, James. 

[EXIT James d.r., Matilda primps self 
ENTER Bob d.r,, carrying a bunch of flowers. 

Bob (gives flowers to Matilda,). From my sister. 

Matilda (giggles). How lovely. 

Bob. I suppose Mae would feel leaving such a happy 
home. 

Matilda. I try to make it so. 

Bob. How could you do otherwise 1 



18 Wait and See 

Matilda (dreamingly). Sometimes it is hot 

Bob. Yes, it is very hot. Shall I open the window? 

Matilda (recovering self). Oh! but not as hot as 
California at this time of the year. I should enjoy 
California. I like heat. I am not strong, Robert, but 
the hot weather always agrees with me. Yes, I am 
positive I would enjoy California. 

Bob (confused). Yes. Would you prefer me, then, 
to shut the window? 

Matilda. The window r ? Yes, perhaps it would be 
better. Oh, Robert, if only my dear dead sister was 
here to tell me how to answer you. I miss her guidance, 
her motherly advice. 

Bob. Mae's mother? I suppose she was beautiful? 

Matilda. Perhaps you would not have considered 
her beautiful. She was not a bit like me. 

Bob. Is Mae like her? 

Matilda. Oh, my, no. My sister was pretty. 

Bob. Well, I am a plain man, not much of a judge 
of beauty 

Matilda. Oh, don't say that 

Bob. But I know when I like a face. Miss Matilda, 
I consider an honest face more important than mere 
good looks. 

Matilda. Oh, of course. 

Bob. In a man, I mean. I trust, Miss Matilda, that 
you have no aversion to my face — or me. (Matilda 
buries face in flowers, titters) I wish I could flatter 
myself that you even liked me. 

Matilda. I do (Doivncast eyes) a — little. 

Bob (jumps up). How good it is of you to say that. 
Now I know you will help me to make Mr. Langster see 
it in this light. (Buns out of room c, falls over chairs) 

Matilda (eyes and moutli wide open). Well, men in 
love certainly do act queer. Oh, if only my dear de- 
parted sister was here to witness my happiness. She 

Dick (stands at d.r., hesitates). Oh, I beg your par- 
don, Aunt. I did not think there was anyone in here. 

Matilda. Come right in, Dick. I was going up to 
bed anyway. (Walks to door l., playfully) Now, Dickie, 
don't work too hard. [EXIT d.l. 



Wait and See 19 

Dick (laughs). Dear old auntie, she hasn't lost her 
girlish ways yet. (Looks around room) Now where 
in thunder will I put these papers? Josephine's be- 
havior has so upset me I am afraid I will lose them. 
(Spies safe) Ah, ah, just the thing. I could not find 
a better place. (Goes to safe, opens it. Diana sneaks 
in at 0., hides behind curtain, watches Dick closely as 
he locks the safe) There, that is done and I feel a 
weight taken off of my shoulders. Guess 1 11 go out and 
have a smoke before going to bed. (Dick EXITS c, 
Diana comes out of hiding place, goes to d.r., calls Tom 
softly) 

ENTER Tom d.r. 
Tom. Well, what good news now? 
Diana (points to safe). In there you will find your 
prize. 

Tom. Are you sure of this Hush ! (Both listen) 

Quick, some one is coming. (Both hide quickly) 
ENTER Mr. Langster d.l. 
Mr. Langster (searches through papers). Now where 
in Sam Hill did I put that bunch of letters? I could 
almost swear I left them here. Perhaps Dick knows. 

[EXIT a, muttering 
Tom and Diana come out of hiding place. 
Tom. Whew! that was a narrow escape. The old 
man would want to know what we were doing down 
here so late. 

Diana. I should say it was. 

Tom. I wonder if I know the combination of that 

safe? Let me see (Thinks) 

Diana (from door, hisses). Quick! Hide! (Both 
hide quickly) 

ENTER Dick and Mr. Langster c. 
Dick. Perhaps, Dad, you put the letters in the safe I 
Mr. Langster. I hardly think so, Dick. 
Dick. Nevertheless, 111 see. (Opens safe, almost 
touching Tom) Dad, I win. Here they are. (Holds 
out bunch of letters. Dick and Mr. Langster EXIT c. f 
talking) 

Tom and Diana come out of hiding places. 



20 Wait and See 

Tom. Perhaps we will be successful this time. (Tries 
safe) Two to the right, three to the left. 

Diana (listens at d.r J. Quick! (Both hide) 
ENTER Mr. Harrison d.r., crawling. 

Mr. Harrison. Oh, my little lopinticks, where are 
you? (Searches under chairs, couch, etc. Comes very 
near finding Tom, Diana. Crawls out c.) Oh, lopin- 
ticks, lop [EXIT d.r. 

Tom and, Diana come out of hiding places, both laugh. 

Diana. Well, in all my days I have never come across 
a species of that kind. 

Tom. Neither have I. (Looks at watch) Ye gods, 
we shall have to hurry if we want to get this done to- 
night. 

Diana. All right. 1 11 stand here and watch. (Stands 
at d.l., Tom busy trying safe. Diana rushes over, grabs 
him by arm. Both barely have time to hide) 
ENTER Servant d.l., tries doors, windows, etc., and 
EXITS d.l. 

Tom. That settles it for tonight. 

Diana. I fully agree with you. I am so nervous 
now that to go on would be useless. 

CURTAIN 

ACT III 

SCENE : — Same as Act I and Act II. The next eve- 
ning DISCOVERED Matilda sitting l. of table, 
knitting. 

ENTER Mr. Langster d.l. 
Mr Langster. Matilda, are you well enough to listen 
to me for a moment? 

Matilda. Yes, what is it? 

Mr. Langster, Bob has just asked me to consent to 
his engagement. 

Matilda (brightly). I knew it. 
Mr. Langster. What! Did he speak to you first? 
Matilda. John, I am old enough — I mean I am not 
so young that his speaking to me could be considered 
improper. 



Wait and See 21 

Mr. Langster (puzzled). No, indeed. 

Matilda. I gave him the answer of my heart. You 
will give us your blessing, my brother ? 

Mr. Langster (walks up and down stage). Hearing 
you talk, one might conclude that you made the match. 

Matilda (sobs). To think — that — my own brother 
would talk to me like that. 

Mr. Langster. Well, I can't help it. Mae and Bob 
must settle it between them. 

Matilda. Oh, Mae will be pleased to get so charming 
an uncle. 

Mr. Langster (sharply). I believe you do not quite 
understand. Bob has asked Mae to marry him, and as 
I am her guardian he has asked me to give my consent. 

Matilda (wildly). There is some mistake. You have 
misunderstood or I have been duped. No gentleman 
makes love to two women at a time. (Falls in chair) 

Mr. Langster (shrugs shoulders). Is that so? My! 
My! 

Matilda. John I will thank you to leave me for the 
present. (Cries) 

Mr. Langster. Very well. [EXIT d.l. 

ENTER Catherine c. 

Catherine (puts arms around Matilda's neck, un- 
fastens necklace, slips it into pocket unnoticed by Ma- 
tilda,) Dear, dear, what is it that makes you cry? 

Matilda (sobs). Oh, oh, to think he could have de- 
ceived me so. 

Catherine. There, there, has the naughty man been 
annoying you? 

Matilda. Why, he might be her father. I don't 
think it's nice for a young girl to marry an old man. 

Catherine (shakes head). Neither do I. 

Matilda. She is very plain. I can't imagine what 
he sees in her. But, of course he is past the heyday of 
youth. Well, some women like to get their lovers sec- 
ond-hand. 

Catherine. I shouldn't. 

Matilda. No, indeed. 

Catherine. But, by the way, who is the cause of all 
this sob stuff? 



22 Wait and See 

Matilda. Why, my niece Mae and Robert Jones. 

Catherine. Oh, indeed. But listen. I too have been 
duped. Hush! (Looks around stage) My Romeo, my 
hero has eloped with fair Rosalind, leaving me in the 
lurch. (Fake rage) Ah, ah, I shall have my revenge. 
1 ' Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. ' ' 

Matilda (frightened). But, but who are they? 

Catherine. Haven 't you heard that Agnes and Fred 
eloped last night? 

Matilda. No! Those children? Why, it is prepos- 
terous. 

Catherine. Tis sad, but true. And I loved him so ! 
Oh, dear! Oh, dear! 

Matilda (goes towards d.l.J. I shall have to find 
Daisy at once and see what she intends doing about 
this. , [EXIT d.l. 

Catherine. Gee, that got the old woman going. Won- 
der if it ever occurred to her that it is worse for an old 
woman to marry a young man? Oh, my dear, no — 

why 

ENTER Agnes and Fred c. They see Catherine, turn 
to go out. Catherine catches them. 

Catherine. Ah, ah! So there you are. Come in. 
Let me see you. (Eyes them) Yes, you do look like a 
pair of turtle doves. 

Agnes and Fred (together). Now, Catherine, you had 
better 

Catherine (waves hand). Hush children. Let me 
bestow upon you my blessing. (Raises hands in mock 
benediction) Bless you, my children, and may the god 
of matrimony look down upon you and make your life 
a happy and ferocious one. 

Fred and Agnes (together). Ferocious? 

Catherine. Ah, gee ! I suppose my vocabulary is a 
little rusty, but honestly I do wish you two happiness. 

Agnes But, but I don't understand. I thought you 
wanted Fred. 

Catherine. Say, don't make me smile. I thought 
you two were slowing down. You were not full of pep 
enough to suit me, so I simply stepped in and gave you 
a push. 



Wait and See 23 



Fred. I don't under- 
Agnes Do you mean to say- 



Catherine. There, there, children, do be quiet and 
let me talk. I figured out that if I could make you 
jealous and Fred anxious to get rid of me, you would 
do the thing you did; therefore my plan has succeeded 
and you two are happy. 

Fred (extending hand). Put it there, you are some 
brick. 

Agnes (kisses Catherine ). I think you are perfectly 
adorable. 

Catherine. Ah, quit the comedy. Come along, I 
want to bestow upon you my wedding gift. 
[EXIT all three d.l., talking and laughing, Fred in 

center 

ENTER Dick and Mrs. Langster d.r. 

Dick. Really, Mother, I wish Josephine would be 
sensible. 

Mrs. Langster. Sensible? Why, I think you have 
treated Josephine most shamefully. 

Dick. But, mother — I — oh, can't you understand? 

Mrs. Langster. I am afraid not. What is the ex- 
% planation for all this curious behavior ? 

Dick. Mother, that is what I cannot explain just 
now, but if you all would only wait and see. 

Mrs. Langster. And in the meantime you may lose 
Josephine. 

Dick. Mother, I am sure everything will turn out 
O. K. 

Mrs. Langster. And how long, pray, must we wait 
and see? 

Dick. Not long. 

Mrs. Langster. Well, it is beyond me. I suppose 
you two must fight it out between you. | EXIT D.R, 

Dick (looks at watch). A few more minutes and the 
deal goes through, and then — everything will be 0, K. 

[EXIT d.r. 
ENTER Matilda d.l., Mr, Harrison d.r., with bottle in 
hand. They bump into each other. 

Matilda. Oh, I 



24 Wait and Sea 

Mr. Harrison. Really, I (Look at one another, 

laugh foolishly) 

Matilda (looks at bottle). Oh, oh, what is it? 

Mr. Harrison. This, Miss Matilda, is dear little lopin- 
ticks. The precious little thing tried to get away from 
me last night, but I found it. 

Matilda (shakes head). I love lopintieks. 

Mr. Harrison. Really, Miss Matilda? (Both sit on 
couch) Then you are the first woman I have ever met 
that had any brains. 

Matilda (giggles). Now, now, Mr. Harrison. 

Mr. Harrison. When I speak of my precious little 
specimens none of them seems to understand. 

Matilda. How stupid of them. J would know a 
lopingsquits any place. 

Mr. Harrison (laughs). How cutely you pronounce 
it. It is lopintieks. 

Matilda (giggles). Tell me all about it. 

Mr. Harrison. Well, this little fellow's quinintics and 

onitlags far surpass the abomintrellis or (Looks at 

bottle) Oh! oh! it has gone. 

Matilda. What? What has gone? 

Mr. Harrison (on hands and knees). Why — eh — eh — 
lopintieks. 

Matilda. No ? (Both crawl around stage looking for 
bug, funny situation. Bob and Mae sta^d at door c, 
look at two, wink, laugh softly, EXIT,) 

Matilda. Oh, oh, here it is! 

Mr. Harrison (crawls over to her, bumps over chairs, 
etc.). Where? Where? 

Matilda (points finger). There, there! 

Mr. Harrison. Catch it, quick! 

Matilda. I — can't — I am afraid. 

Mr. Harrison. It won't (Catches it) hurt you. 

Matilda. Oh ! 

Mr. Harrison (to bug). Dear little lopintieks was — 
o-o frightened. Did naughty woman upset you ? 

[EXIT d.r. 

Matilda (still on knees). Well — if — that does not 
beat all. (Rises) Thank God I can enjoy single bles- 



Wait and See 25 

sedness — imagine having one of those things around 
me all the time ! Ugh! [EXIT d.r. 

ENTER Servant d.l., arranges chairs, etc., extinguishes 

light, EXIT c. 
ENTEE Diana on tiptoe, followed by Tom with search- 
light. 

Tom. Sh, sh ! (Low voice to Diana ) Here, take this. 
(Diana takes light, holds it while Tom tries safe and 
opens it) 

Diana. Quick, I think some one is coming. 

Tom. Do be still. 

Diana. What was that? 

Tom. What? 

Diana. Listen. (Both listen) 

Tom. That was only the wind. (Searches through 
papers in safe, Diana nervously looking around) 

Diana. Listen. (Both listen) 

Tom. Really, I wish you would control yourself. I 
have to get that paper tonight or be ruined. 

Diana. I don't care, I am sure I heard a step out- 
side. (Goes to d.c, stumbles over chairs, loud noise) 

Tom. Ye gods! 

Diana. Oh! 

ENTER Servant a, switches on light. 

Servant. Good-evening. Did you ring? 

Tom. Trapped! (Tries to go out window, Servant 
catches him) 

Servant. Just a minute, please. Not in such a hurry 
there. 

Tom. Let me go, you fool ! 

Servant (points pistol). Call me that again. 
Mr. and Mrs. Langster run in d.l., followed by Ma- 
tilda, Mr. Harrison, Fred and Josephine. All 
look on in amazement. Diana's head bowed down. 
Tom's face black as thunder. 

Mrs. Langster. Why, why, what does 

Mr. Langster ( goes to safe). Ye gods, what — has hap- 
pened here ? 

Tom. Tell your servant to lower that gun. 

Servant. Not on your life, Sonny. 



26 Wait and See 

Tom. I tell you he is dangerous. 

Diana. Oh, Tom! 

Tom. Shut up ! (All gasp) Mr. Langster, I will tell 
you the truth. I came in here and found this man 
(Points to Servant J and this woman (Points to Diana J 
at your safe. 

Servant. You dog! 

Diana. You cur! 

Tom. Before I could call for help, he covered me 
with his pistol. 

Servant (Msses). You lie — you 

Diana (cries). Oh, how could you! 

Tom. Mrs. Langster, I crave your pardon for intro- 
ducing this woman here. I thought she was on the 
level, but, as you see, I was duped. 

Mr. Langster. I shall ring up the police right away. 

Tom. Yes, do. Oh, how I have been imposed upon. 
Mrs. Langster, say you will forgive me. 

Mrs. Langster. There, there, Tom, don't worry about 
it. We are all taken in one time or another. 

Diana (with spirit). Stop! (All look at Iter in 
astonishment) Before you ring for the police, Mr. 
Langster, I will tell you my story. You can believe me 
or not. 

Tom. Don't listen to her. I tell you I found them 
at your safe ; they are dangerous. 

Mr. Langster, There, there, Tom, just a minute. I 
will do this thing fairly. Out with your story, miss. 

Tom. But I tell you (Mr. Langster waves Jiim 

to silence) 

Diana. Five years ago I was as happy aa any one 
of you. I came of a family as wealthy and as proud 
as any one of yours 

Tom. I tell you 

Diana. My father was a very hard man, but I be- 
lieve underneath it all, kind. One day my father and 
I quarrelled about paying a bill — I threatened to get 
the money somehow — by that I meant to sell some of 
my own property. I rushed out of the house, went to a 
fashionable shop to purchase something. While there a 
woman's purse containing a considerable sum of money 



Wait and See 27 

was stolen. It was found on me. They arrested me. 
One of our servants told of the scene I had had with 
my father. What could I do? The odds were against 
me. To appeal to my father was useless. He was proud 
and would not help me. I was sent up for a year. (Hand 
over face) Oh! when I think of that terrible year — 
suffering for another woman's guilt. (Pauses) 

Tom. I tell you, she lies! 

Servant. Shut up. 

Diana. After my term was up I was too proud to go 
to my father. To get work was almost useless. The 
shadows of the prison cell seemed to follow me wher- 
ever I went. (Pauses. All much moved) Finally I 
secured a position at Bets. Again a robbery was com- 
mitted- — and — he (Points to Tom ) accused me of taking 
the money. No matter what I said to the contrary, he 
laughed I gave up. He threatened to turn me over 
to tfie authorities if I did not do as he wished. (All 
look at Tom in amazement) 

Tom. I tell you the woman is lying. 

Diana. I was weak. I could not face those prison 
walls again. I consented. He wanted to secure a docu- 
ment of Dick's — he 

Tom (cries), I tell you she- 



Servant (to Tom J. Shut up! 

Diana. Dogged my every step. The result is — you 

can see — so (To Mr. LangsterJ call up the police. 
(Sighs) I am ready. 

ENTER Dick d.r., rushes in, stops, looks at all in amaze- 

ment. 

Dick. Well, what does this mean? (Turns to Tomj 
Hello, Tom. Sorry, old top, you are a little too late. 
The deal went through today. 

Tom. My G 

Dick (to Servant,). Now, James, let it out. 

Servant (goes up to Diana ). Look at me. Don't you 
recognize me? 

Diana (looks at Servant ). No — I — can't say I do. 

Servant (to Mr. and, Mrs. LangsterJ. I want to 
present to you Miss Evelyn Soran. 



28 Wait and See 

Mr. Langster. What ! Not Evelyn Soran — daughter 
of Sam Soran ? 

Servant. The same. 

Diana (clutches Servant's arm). Tell me, tell me, 
who are you? 

Servant. Don't you remember Hawkins? 

Diana. Good heavens, not Hawkins, my father's most 
trusted friend? 

Servant. The same. I suppose I have changed a 
great deal since you saw me last, but nevertheless I am 
he. (All look on in wonderment) 

Diana. But tell me, where is dad? How is he? 

Servant. Your dad is 

Diana. Yes, yes. 

Servant. Oh, he is all right now. (Averted face) 

Diana. My — dad — is Oh, oh ! Tell me it is not 

true! (Cries) And he thought me guilty! (Falls in 
chair, buries face in hands) 

Servant (pats Diana's head). There, there, child — 
but he did not die thinking you guilty. Long ago we 
found out you were innocent and for years have been 
trying to trace you. At your father's death bed I 
promised him that while there was a spark of life left 
in me I would hunt for you and tell you he died begging 
your forgiveness for thinking so harshly of you. 

Diana. Oh, then he did know I was innocent! (Out- 
stretched arms) Oh, dad, if you were only here! 

Servant. To make a long story short, I traced you 
here. I would have made myself known to you at once, 
but as a special favor to Dick I waited. He knew of 
Tom's trick. In order to double-cross him he played 
his part — you know, sort of let on to you that the much- 
sought-after document was still here. 

Diana. But wasn't it? 

Servant (laughs). Indeed not. While you two were 
seeking the document Dick was busy putting it through. 

Diana (looks around at bewildered group). Oh, what 
you must think of me ! I am a thief in all your eyes. 

Dick. Indeed, you are not. We are well posted on 
the way this (Meaning Tom,) scoundrel took advantage 
of you. 



Wait and See 29 

Servant. Yes, I made it my business to overhear all 
that passed between you two. 

Diana (to Mrs. Langster ). Then you do believe all 
that I have told you, don't you? 

Mrs. Langster (takes Diana in arms). Indeed I do, 
you poor child ! How you must have suffered ! 

Servant. And in conclusion I wish to inform you 
that Oakland Manor is still without a mistress. Your 
dad left everything to you. 

Diana (softly). Poor old dad. What a curse too 
much pride is. We were both too proud to give in. 

Servant (to Mr. Langster ). Well, sir, what do you 
intend doing to this? (Points to Tom ) 

Mr. Langster. I will leave that entirely up to Dick. 

Dick. Well, I would suggest that you let him go. I 
have gained my point, so I should worry about him. 

Mr. Langster (\o Tom J. Sir, see that door? (Points 
to d.r. J It leads to the street — so go. 

Tom (walks to d.r., Jtead bent down, pauses at door, 
turns). I — am a ruined man — but just to show you that 
there still is left in me a spark of manhood, I want to 
tell you that she (Points to Diana ) is entirely innocent 
of the Bet's robbery. Good-night. [EXIT d.r. 

ENTER Catherine d.l., stands witln hands on Mps, looks 

around. 

Catherine. Hello! Why the crowd? 

Diana. Oh, Catherine, at last I am free! 

Catherine. Nothing to be startled about. I knew 
you would be sooner or later. 

Diana. And they all know that I am innocent. 

Catherine (turns quickly). Indeed! I would like to 
see them think otherwise. (Tugs at pocket) By the 
way, does this belong to anyone? (Holds up necklace ) 

Matilda (feels neck, starts forward). Why, where 
did you get it? (Takes necklace) 

Catherine (Jtolds up stick-pin). And this? 

Fred (feels tie). Why — eh — eh that is 

Catherine. Mr. Harrison, look in your wallet and 
see if there is anything missing. 

Mr. Harrison (quickly searches wallet). Ye gods! 
My money is 



30 Wait and See 

Catherine. There, there, don't get excited. Here it 
is. (Hands over money. Mr. Harrison eagerly counts 
it. To Diana ) So you see, Diana, when I gave you that 
promise, I meant it. I only wanted to prove how easily 
it could be done. ( Walks to door) So long, folks. Me 
for the straight and narrow path after this. 

Diana (grabs Catherine's arm). But where are you 
going? You are not leaving me? 

Catherine. What would you want with me? You, 
the rich mistress of Oakland Manor. 

Diana. Do you think that wall make any difference 
between us? Why, child, you proved the greatest pal a 
person in my position could have had. You believed 
in me all the time. 

Catherine. Oh, quit 

Diana. The Manor is large and I will be lonesome, 
so I want you to come as my sister. 

Catherine. What! Do you mean it? Me, your 
sister ? 

Diana. Will you? 

Catherine. Well — I — should say I will! (They em- 
brace) 

Diana. Come along, Catherine. I want to pack. 

[EXIT v.i,., talking. 

Mr. Langster. Well, folks, I think we had better get 
to bed. This sure has been an exciting night. 
[All EXIT d.l. and d.r., excepting Josephine and Dick 

Dick (holding out ring). Josephine, (Goes to Jose- 
phine,) shall I put this on again, this time never to come 
off? (Josephine holds out finger for ring) And now 
you understand why I asked you to please wait and see. 
The money I received through that deal is going to buy 
our home. 

Josephine. Dick ! 

Dick. Josephine! (They embrace) 

CURTAIN 



FARCES 



A RUNAWAY COUPLE 

Farce in Two Acta. Four Males, Four Females 
By W. A. Tbemaynb 
One interior scene. A married man of nervous temperament, haying 
assumed temporary charge of an eloping young lady while the hug* 
band-to-be is absent procuring the marriage license, is himself accused 
ef having run away with her. Circumstantial evidence Is very 
strongly against him, but the timely arrival of the absent lover 
relieves the situation and leads to an unusually effective climax. 
Plays two hours. 

PRICE 25 CENTS 
•» * ' - ■ » - 

THE DELEGATES FROM DENVER 

Farce in Two Acts. Three Males, Ten Females 
By Samuel N. Clabk 
Two interior scenes. Margaret is a candidate for president of the 
Eta Pi Sorority which meets at Boston. John has proposed to her, 
but she defers her answer as she purposes, if elected, to devote her 
whole time to the Sorority. Two delegates from Denver decline to 
attend ; John and Edward plan to represent them and vote against 
Margaret, and also to prevent her from going to Boston. Their plan 
partially succeeds, but it ends in discovery, explanations, and Mar^ 
garet's engagement to John, including some other pleasant denoue* 
nients. The action is absurdly farcical and very much alive from 
•tart to finish. Plays forty-five minutes. 

PRICE 25 CENTS 

A ROGUE'S LUCK 

Farce in Three Acts, Five Males, Three Females 
By Levin C. Tees 
One interior, one exterior scene. Harry Haversham, a rascally 
fugitive from justice, is stopping at a mountain summer resort under 
the name of Felix Hopper. By colossal nerve and ready wit he gains 
the confidence of everybody, using another Harry Haversham as his 
foil, and plans a series of rapidly occurring perplexities and as- 
tounding " situations " which contribute at last to his identification 
and finish as a rogue of the first water. Plays two hours. 
PRICE 25 CENTS 

JOHN BRAG 

Farce in Four Acts. Eight Males. Five Females 

By Gordon V. May 

One interior, one exterior scene. Brag, a rather sporty old fellow, 

to save himself from financial ruin pretends to be dead, and this 

leads to all kinds of comic complications. The characters are all 

food and there is nothing slow In the piece. A certain success, 
lays two and a half hours. 

PRICE 25 CENTS 

Air. SMALLWORTH'S MISTAKE ; or, NOAH'S ARK, Jr. 

Farce in One Act. Four Males, Three Femuhs 

By Samuel Emeby 

One interior scene, modern costumes. A genuinely funny piece, 

which satirizes the maudlin love for animals that is displayed by 

«ome owners of pets. A profane parrot and a youne curate lust out 

of the seminary, sustain a series of complications that culminate in 

ft half-hitched wedding. No love-making. Plays forty-five sninure* 

PRICE 15 CENTS 



FARCES 



▲ DOCTOR BY COURTESY; OR, A JOLLY MIX U* 

Farce in Three Acts. Six Males, Five Females 
By Ullib Akebstrom 
tRwo Interior scenes. Costumes modern. Sly's father-in-law adopt! 
methods to foroe Sly into practice, with disaster to Sly throughout. 
Sly's wife is led by Florette to test Sly's fidelity by calling him in 
professionally. Sly allows Freddie to personate him, leading to com- 
plications in which every one gets mixed up. Flirtations of Sly before 
marriage also add to his perplexities, all of which are finally un- 
ravelled. The ** situations B which follow each other in rapid suc- 
cession make this farce irresistibly comic. Plays two hours. 
PRICE 25 CENTS 

A PUZZLED DETECTIVE 

Farce in Three Acts. Five Males, Three Females 
By L. E. W. Snow 
Three Interior scenes. A letter inclosing money, abstracted by a 
darkey who cannot read, causes Ned Walton, the detective, to get his 
client's affairs all muddled up, resulting in absurd situations, es- 
pecially when the darkey is supposed to be Walton In disguise. A 
needy doctor finds his daughter, a brother discovers his sister, and 
two girl chums become sisters-in-law to their great satisfaction, and 
the muddle is cleared up. Plays one hour. 

PRICE 15 CENTS 

___. THE H ooSIER SCHOOL ~™ 

Farce in One Act. Five Males, Five Females 
By Wm. and Josephine Giles 
One interior scene. A realistic picture of a district school In a 
small Western village. The rough and ready teacher and his tricky 
scholars keep the audience in a roar. The teacher is finally squelched 
by the irate mother of one of his pupils. The piece is cleverly worked 
out and full of funny incidents. Plays thirty minutes. 
PRICE 15 CENTS 

MRS. FORRESTER'S CRUSADE 

Farce in One Act, One Male, Two Females 
By C. Leona Dalrymple 
One Interior scene. Helen has written to Professor Butler, Inviting 
him to call to obtain her parents' consent to their engagement. Mrs. 
Forrester, her mother, also writes inviting him, and requests his co- 
operation in her endeavor to cure Helen of her habit of using slang 
expressions. This letter was mislaid and not sent. He calls, and 
during the interview Mrs. Forrester crowds into her conversation all 
the atrocities of slang possible, to Helen's consternation and Butler's 
disgust. Finally, the missing letter accidentally turns up. Mrs. 
Forrester's attempts at slang are screamingly funny. Plays thirty 
minutes. 

PRICE 15 CENTS 

A LEGAL PUZZLE 

Farce Comedy in Three Acts. Seven Males, Five Females 
By W. A. Tremayne 
Three Interior scenes. Costumes modern. This play can be highly 
recommended, the scenes are easy, the dialogue brisk and snappy, 
and the action rapid. The parts are all good, being evenly divide^ 
Ui principals appearing in each act. Plays two and a half hours. 
PRICE 25 CENTg 




MILITARY PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

BY THE ENEMY'S HAND. 4 Acts; 2 hours 10* 4 

EDWARDS, THE SPY. 5 Acts; 2^ hours 10. 4 

PRISONER OF ANDEKSONVILLE. 4 Acts; 2*4 hours.. 10 4 

CAPTAIN DICK. 3 Acts; \y 2 hours 9 6 

ISABEL, THE PEARL OF CUBA. 4 Acts; 2 hours 9 3 

LITTLE SAVAGE. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 4 4 

BY FORCE OF IMPULSE. (15 cents.) 5 Acts; 2)4 hours 9 3 

BETWEEN TWO FIRES. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 2 hours 8 3 



RURAL PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

MAN FROM MAINE. 5 Acts; 2*4 hours 9 

AMONG THE BERKSHIRES. 3 Acts; 2^ hours 8 

OAK FARM. 3 Acts; 2^ hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 

GREAT WINTERSON MINE. 8Acts;2hours 6 

SQUIRE THOMPKINS' DAUGHTER. 5 Acts; 2^ hours 5 

WHEN A MAN'S SINGLE. 3Acts;2hours 4 

FROM PUNKIN RIDGE. (15 cents.) 1 Act; lhour... 6 

LETTER FROM HOME. (15 cents.) 1 Act; 25 minutes 1 



ENTERTAINMENTS 

25 CENTS EACH 

AUNT DINAH'S QUILTING PARTY. 1 Scene 5 11 

BACHELOR MAIDS' REUNION. 1 Scene 2 30 

IN THE FERRY HOUSE. 1 Scene; 1^ hours 19 15 

JAPANESE WEDDING. 1 Scene; 1 hour 3 10 

MATRIMONIAL EXCHANGE. 2 Acts; 2 hours 6 9 

OLD PLANTATION NIGHT. 1 Scene; \y A hours 4 4 

YE VILLAGE SKEWL OF LONG AGO. 1 Scene. 13 12 

FAMILIAR FACES OF A FUNNY FAM 1 LY 8 11 

JOLLY BACHELORS. Motion Song or Recitation 11 

CHRISTMAS MEDLEY. 30 minutes 15 14 

EASTER TIDINGS. 20 minutes 

BUNCH OF ROSES. (1 5 routs.) 1 Act; V. 2 hours 1 18 

OVER THE GARDEN WALL. (ir> oents) n 8 



FITZGERALD PUBLISHING CORPORATION 

SUCCESSOR TO 
DICK & FITZGERALD, 18 Vcscy Street, N. Y. 



COMEDIES i 

25 CEN' 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 

Nil 

015 906 389 6 * 



BREAKING HIS BO^DS. 4Acte; 2hours 

BUTTERNUT'S BRIDE. 3Acts; 2^hours 11 

COLLEGE CHUMS. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stag* Setting 

COUNT OF NO ACCOUNT. 3 Acts; 2^ hours 

DEACON. 5 Acts; 2^ hours 

DELEGATES FROM DENVER. 2 Acts; 45 minutes.... 

DOCTOR BY COURTESY. 3Acts;2hours 

EASTSIDERS, The. 8 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 

ESCAPED FROM THE LAW. 5 Acts; 2 hours 

GIRL FROM PORTO RICO. 8 Acts; 2^ hours 

GYPSY QUEEN. 4 Acts; 2^ hours 

IN THE ABSENCE OF SUSAN. 8 Acts; 1^ hours 

JAIL BIRD. 5 Acts; 2^ hours 

JOSIAH'S COURTSHIP. 4 Acts; 2 hours 

MY LADY DARRELL. 4 Acts; 2% hours 

MY UNCLE FROM INDIA. 4 Acts; 2\b hours 13 

NEXT DOOR. 3 Acts; 2 hours 5 

PHYLLIS'S INHERITANCE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 

REGULAR FLIRT. 3Acts;2hours 

ROGUE'S LUCK. 3Acts;2hours 5 

SQUIRE'S STRATAGEM. 5 Acts; 2\i hours 6 

STEEL KING. 4 Acts; 2% hours 5 

WHAT'S NEXT? 3 Acts; 2)4 hours 7 

WHITE LIE. 4Acts; 2% hours 4 



10 



WESTERN PLAYS 

25 CENTS EACH 

ROCKY FORD. 4Acts; 2hours 8 

GOLDEN GULCH. 3 Acts; 2% hours 11 

RED ROSETTE. 3 Acts; 2 hours 6 

MISS MOSHER OF COLORADO. 4 Acts; 2^ hours ... 5 
STUBBORN MOTOR CAR. 3 Acts; 2 hours; 1 Stage Setting 7 
CRAWFORD'S CLAIM. (15 cents.) 3 Acts; 214 hours. 9 

FITZGERALD PUBLISHING CORPORATION 

SUCCESSOR TO ^ t 

DICK & FITZGERALD, 18 Vesey Street, N. Y. 



